Coming out on the other side

I had my surgery on March 29.  I got there at 8 a.m. for a 9 a.m. surgery.  The entire staff at St. Francis Hospital in Poughkeepsie, NY worked like a well oiled machine.  I was in the pre-surgical waiting area at 9 a.m. sharp!  They brought me in and there was no count down before I was out.  I only remember waking up in the recovery room.  Well, waking up isn't the right word.  I couldn't wake up, opening my eyes was near to impossible.  They kept talking to me and I could answer them but would drift right off.  The one thing I was unhappy with was the amount of pain in between my shoulder blades and beneath my breast bone.  I was not happy at all and no walking or moving could dislodge it.  I was told it was trapped in my tissues.  Moaning and groaning ensued and not less then a few curse words escaped my lips.  I was given a shot of Demerol and slipped off to sleep again.  I was vaguely aware of John trying to talk to me or comfort me and I admit to being a bit grumpy with him.  Sorry John!  We got out of there at around 6:30 p.m. and I went straight home to bed.  John went and got my meds and some gas-x strips -- I know TMI -- and some Tagament.  I slept wonderfully that night after my meal of 3 ounces of fruit juice.  To date I have consumed 3 ounce liquid meals of low sodium vegetable brother, skinny juice and protein drinks.  Sugar free popsicles are free and don't count as a meal.  Whooo hoooo. 

I am not hungry at all due to the still mild build up of gas and of course the incisions on my torso.  Damnit, no bikini's for me.  LOL I'd roll around on the ground laughing if I could manage to get down and back up again to do so.  I am patiently waiting for tonight when John comes home with applesauce!!  Who would have thought applesauce would have excited me so much? 

I don't regret this yet although I have to admit that it's rather uncomfortable and I am usually quite stoic where pain is concerned.  I am waiting to see this working, as soon as I'm able to work it.

Good news is the scale didn't register a 10 pound weight gain from the IV fluids.  It's actually down a few pounds. Yay me, there is hope for me yet!!

The Beginning has to start sometime

Today is the last day of my old life.  That's so dramatic.  On Tuesday morning, March 29, I am going to be getting banded.  What does that mean to those who don't get it?  Well it means that I am undergoing a surgery that will dramatically reduce the amount of food I am able to consume.  It's called the Lap Band.  I wonder idly at the origin of that name, but I don't wonder too much.  It is what it is and I am going to join an alarmingly large -- no pun intended -- and growing -- damn pun again -- group of people who have already undergone this semi-dramatic way to lose weight. 

So how have I prepared for this particular journey?  Well, I've eaten.  I've eaten most everything I can get my hands on.  I feel like I am going to take the Dead Man's Walk and I've eaten my last meal at least 20 times in the past couple of weeks.  Tomorrow I fast.  It's not because the doctor requires it but because I've made myself ill and can't fit anymore food inside of me!! I am going to be prepared for the day of surgery and immediately following, when chicken broth will be classified as a meal and 4 ounces of skim milk will be classified as a snack. 

I told a friend recently that I was ashamed to have reached this point in my life where my own self control couldn't help me remain healthy. I hate self loathing and don't often sink to its depths.  But I'm frustrated and have nobody to blame but myself.  She said that I am taking a necessary step to get healthy and she encouraged me to start this blog.  So here I am, doing just that.  May the journey begin.